Matthew Snaps His G-String
January 12th, 2008: Starbucks – Humble Texas

     The first event of the New Year finds the trio back at the Humble Starbucks. Due to the inclement weather outside, the threesome abandon the comfort of patio where they normally play and move everything inside. The corner they set up in is more confined; but it’s dry, warm, and better lit than using Lee’s light system. Matthew has coined the phrase the ‘Skylab Set-up Formation’ for these claustrophobic venues that force the band to stack themselves up like Matryoshka nesting dolls.

     Despite the cramped quarters, the guys are pleased to be performing again, and really happy to not be playing Christmas tunes. Drewann and husband, Matt arrive first. They sit in the back of the shop, far enough way from the band to maintain deniability of being associated with them. The two are busily programming a new cell phone that he just received from his parents. They feverously click and text each other looking a lot like castanet players with a single castanet each.

     The crowd begins to trickle in as the evening builds. George’s mother, Mary and her friend Ronnie arrive as the group debuts a soulful version of The Doors’ PEOPLE ARE STRANGE. This is followed up with the Stones’ HONKY TONK WOMAN which George jokingly dedicates to her. Ronnie is so moved, he reaches for the tip jar. The band leans forward…it’s a…a…Filipino bill! Huh? Ronnie is a missionary  (http://www.ronrae.org) on furlough from the Philippines, and apparently  has some leftover currency he needs to dump. “We’re international now!” exclaims Matthew not realizing they’ve just received a tip that’s equivalent to $.45 cents American. George’s brother, Nathan arrives with friend Ellie in time to hear the announcement that Matthew will be gambling the money from the tip jar in Vegas next week. “So every dollar you donate could yield a return of a hundred fold!”

     The ‘What Happened on This Day in History’ trivia segment fails to ignite any notable excitement tonight. Perhaps it’s because Matthew is notably self-conscious this evening. His wife made an off-hand remark as he left home that he was now middle-aged. Lee and George ask “How old will you be for your birthday on Tuesday?” “I’ll be 45.” “Then you’ve been middle-aged for five years...What’s the problem?” “I have? Then I can do this middle-age thing in my sleep!” “Yes, you probably will.”  George is inspired by Matthew’s ‘predicament’ and dedicates a heartfelt version of THAT LUCKY OLD SUN to him.

     Later on, Robert and Eileen respond to the Clapton song WONDERFUL TONIGHT. George lets the audience in on the clown joke parody that the trio does of this tune.

     The evening gains momentum with each song. Things are going smoothly until the second time through the Ray Charles song HALLELUJAH, I LOVE HER SO when there is an unfamiliar ‘THWUNK!’ from the bass section. George looks over to see Matthew examining a limp and dangling bass string - Uh oh. Lee and George finish the tune with an overdramatic ending to mask Matthew’s incapacitated bass. Matthew is distraught: First, finding out he’s middle-aged now this. “These strings cost about $100.00 each.”

     George instantly switches to telethon mode. “All proceeds from tonight’s performance will be delivered to Matthew. We’re sending him to play the slots in Vegas next week in hopes of winning enough to buy a new G bass string.”  Surprisingly, billfolds and purses start coming out and the tip jar begins to fill. Lee secretly looks at his drum set for something that he can break to raise some money of his own. Still in a fundraising mood, George and Lee launch into a number of improvised parodies about a broken bass, G strings in Las Vegas, etc. To be a good sport about it all, Matthew sings his bass parts into the mic. George attempts to persuade Matthew to waltz with the ‘broken’ instrument, but that’s where he draws the line. After a few annoying minutes of persistence, George realizes this is a lost cause. He and Lee finish off the evening with THE CURTAIN FALLS.

     The guys pack up early. In the parking lot, Eileen does her best to persuade Lee to buy more Avon for his wife. George narrowly escapes as he rushes out to meet up with Nathan and Ellie before they head back to Austin. Matthew takes the tip jar and goes home to pack for the bright lights of Vegas.

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